This time of the year is for most people a time to rest. But resting is not always simple and without complications. Many of us also find it hard to unwind and don’t always know how to rest optimally.
So you are taking leave from work, you have days (or weeks) off, you have time to recharge. What do you need to rest well?
Clearing out emotional cobwebs
You’ve had a tiring year. Work has been stressful and demanding. You feel irritable and your fuse is short. You need to change gears. You are moving from producing and managing mode to holiday mode. You will (during the time of rest) be surrounded not by colleagues, but by family and friends. Be mindful: these are your people. Your relationship with them is different to your relationship with co-workers. Can you drop your guard? Should you consider that they need you in a different way?
Take a look at your mindspace: what needs clearing out? What has become redundant? Can you get rid of some baggage? How should your attention shift during your holiday time? Can you communicate this to your loved ones?
There. You’ve set the table. You can start unwinding.
Close encounters, good encounters
After a busy year, many people find it challenging to even contemplate the idea of spending time with family. To some, family is not a safe place, but a battleground, a space filled with complex memories and past hurt.
A beach holiday (or Christmas lunch) is perhaps not the best time to address complex family issues. Consider postponing your plans to raise a tough topic. Rather manage your expectations: in stead of dreaming of the perfect time together, how about a good time in the presence of those close to us? Complicated relationship dynamics can quite often not be modified entirely, but positions within a relationship can change to make a gathering more palatable. You need to discern. Is this a good time to talk about a long-standing family feud? Should we not focus on the things we agree on, for a change? Which topics should rather be avoided?
Know what gives you energy
Your vacation brings the opportunity to rest. It is your time. You need to use it wisely. You know yourself: are you an extrovert? Then you will feel energised when you are in a crowd. Are you an introvert? You probably need to read a book. Are you an introvert who is married to an extrovert? Make space. You will not grow apart if you spend half a day doing different things. On the contrary: you will be a better version of yourself if you know what you need to rest well.
Make your needs known without making it entirely about yourself. You are not here to please everyone. Understand that sometimes you will need to compromise. Don’t be resentful. Aim for balance.
May your holiday time truly be a time to refocus, rest and fruitful recharging.